11 May Portrait of a beautiful person | Part D’
These are people with exceptionally high energy levels. They seem to require less sleep, and yet they are excited about living. They do, and they are healthy. They can muster tremendous surges of energy for completing a task because they choose to be involved in it as a fulfilling present-moment activity. Their energy is not supernatural; it is simply the result of loving life and all the activities in it. They don’t know how to be bored. All life events present opportunities for doing, thinking, feeling and living, and they know how to apply their energy in virtually all life circumstances. Were they to be imprisoned, they would use their minds in creative ways avoid the paralysis of loss of interest. Boredom is not in their lives because they are channeling the same energy that others have in ways productive for themselves.
They are aggressively curious. They never know enough. They search for more and want to learn each and every present moment of their lives. They are not concerned with having to do it right or having done it wrong. If it doesn’t work, or it doesn’t accomplish the greatest amount of good, then it is discarded, rather than mulled over in regret. They are truth seekers in the learning sense, always excited about learning more and never believing they are a finished product. If they are around a barber, they want to learn about barbering. They never feel or act superior, showing off their merit badges for others to applaud. They learn from children and stock brokers and animals. They want to know more about what it means to be a welder, a cook, a hooker, or a corporate vice-president. They are learners not teachers. They never know enough, and they don’t know how to act snobbish or superior, since they never feel that way. Every person, every object, every event represents an opportunity for knowing more. And they are aggressive in their interests, not waiting for information to come along, but going after it. They’re not afraid to talk to a waitress, ask a dentist what it feels like to have your hands in someone’s mouth all day, or inquire of the poet what is meant by this or that line.
They are not afraid to fail. In fact, they often welcome it. They do not equate being successful in any enterprise with being successful as a human being. Since their self-worth comes from within, any external event can be viewed objectively as simply effective or ineffective. They know that failing is merely somebody else’s editorial opinion and not to be feared since it cannot affect self-worth. Thus, they will try anything, participate just because it’s fun, and never fear having to explain themselves. Similarly, they never choose anger in any immobilizing way. Using the same logic (and not having to think it through each time since it has become a way of life) they don’t say to themselves that other people should behave differently and that events should be otherwise. They accept others as they are, and they work at changing events that they dislike. Thus, anger is impossible because the expectancies are not there. These are people who are capable of eliminating emotions that are in any way selfdestructive and facilitating those which are self-enhancing.
These happy individuals display an admirable lack of defensiveness. They won’t play games and try to impress others. They don’t dress for others’ approval, nor do they go through the motions of explaining themselves. They have a simplicity and naturalness, and they won’t get seduced into making issues of small or big things. They aren’t arguers or hot-headed debaters; they simply state their views, listen to others and recognize the futility of trying to convince someone else to be as they are. They’ll simply say, “That’s all right; we’re just different. We don’t have to agree.” They let it go at that without any need to win an argument or persuade the opponent of the wrongness of his position. They are unafraid of giving a bad impression but they don’t strive to do so.
Their values are not local. They do not identify with the family, neighborhood, community, city, state, or country. They see themselves as belonging to the human race, and an unemployed Austrian is no better or worse than an unemployed Californian. They are not patriotic to a special boundary; rather they see themselves as a part of the whole of humanity. They take no glee in having more enemy dead, since the enemy is as human as the ally. The lines drawn by men to describe how one should be affiliated are not subscribed to. They transcend traditional boundaries, which often causes others to label them as rebels or even traitors.
They have no heroes or idols. They view all people as human, and they place no one above themselves in importance. They do not demand justice at every turn. When someone else has more privileges, they see that as a benefit to that person, rather than as a reason for being unhappy. When playing an opponent they want him to do well, rather than wishing a poor performance in order to win by default. They want to be victorious and effective on their own, rather than gaining through the shortcomings of others. They do not insist that everyone be equally endowed, but look inward for their happiness. They are not critics, nor do they take pleasure in other people’s misfortunes. They are too busy being, to notice what their neighbors are doing.
Most significantly, these are individuals who love themselves. They are motivated by a desire to grow, and they always treat themselves well when given the option. They have no room for self-pity, self-rejection, or self-hate. If you ask them, “Do you like yourself?” you’ll get a resounding, “Of course I do!” They are rare birds indeed. Each day is a delight. They have it together and they live all of their present moments. They are not problem free, but free from emotional immobility as a result of the problems. The measure of their mental health is not in whether they slip but in what they do when they slip. Do they lie there and whine about having fallen? No, they get up, dust themselves off, and get on with the business of living. People who are free from erroneous zones don’t chase after happiness; they live and happiness is their payoff.
Part A’: http://www.lecturesbureau.gr/1/portrait-of-a-beautiful-person-part-a/?lang=en
Part B’: http://www.lecturesbureau.gr/1/portrait-of-a-beautiful-person-part-b/?lang=en
Part C’: http://www.lecturesbureau.gr/1/the-portrait-of-a-beautiful-person-part-c/?lang=en
YOUR ERRONEOUS ZONES
WAYNE W. DYER
