16 Jan We need to open our eyes, to use the truth, and to see what really is. (DON MIGUEL RUIZ)
Everything is there for us, but first we need to have the courage to open our eyes, to use the truth, and to see what really is. Humans are so blind, and they are blind because they don’t want to see. Let’s look at an example.
A young woman meets a man and she feels a strong attraction for him right away. Her hormones go all the way up, and she just wants the man. All her girlfriends can see what this man is. He’s on drugs, he’s not working, he’s got all those traits that make a woman suffer so much. But she sees him, and what does she see? She only sees what she wants to see. She sees that he’s tall, he’s handsome, he’s strong, he’s charming. She creates an image of the man and tries to deny what she doesn’t want to see. She lies to herself. She really wants to believe the relationship will work. The girlfriends say, “But he’s on drugs, he’s an alcoholic, he’s not working.” She says, “Yes, but my love is going to change him.”
Of course, her mother hates the man, and the father does, too. Her parents are worried about her because they can see where she is going. They say, “This is not a good man for you.” The young woman says, “You are telling me what to do.” She goes against Mom and against Dad to follow her hormones, and she lies to herself trying to justify her choices. “It’s my life, and I’m going to do whatever I want to do.” Months later, the relationship brings her back to reality. The truth starts coming out, and she blames the man for what she didn’t want to see before. There’s no respect, there’s a lot of abuse, but now her pride is more important. How can she go back home when Mom and Dad were right? That will only give them satisfaction. How long will it take for this woman to learn the lesson? How much does she love herself? What is the limit of her self-abuse?
All that suffering occurs because we don’t want to see, when it is so clear before our eyes. Even when we meet someone and he tries to pretend to be the best he can, even with that false mask, he cannot avoid presenting the lack of love, the lack of respect he has. But we don’t want to see it and we don’t want to hear. That is why an ancient prophet once said, “There is no worse blind man than the one who doesn’t want to see. There is no worse deaf man than the one who doesn’t want to hear. And there is no worse madman than the one who doesn’t want to understand.”
We are so blind, we really are, and we pay for that. But if we open our eyes and see life as it is, we can avoid a lot of emotional pain. It doesn’t mean we don’t take a risk. We are alive and we need to take risks, and if we fail, so what? Who cares? It doesn’t matter. We learn and we move on without judgment. We don’t need to judge; we don’t need to blame or feel guilt. We just need to accept our truth and intend a new beginning.
The Mastery of Love
DON MIGUEL RUIZ